Saturday, January 17, 2009,
9:31 PM
Time now is 2130hrs.
I am very depressed...
I am not happy with myself...
I am not happy with work...
I am not happy with my life...
I am not happy with the people around me...
I am so unhappy about work... Why am helping a moron boss in the work? He is someone really not capable to be our boss. During such a downtime, he almost chased away all the customers, have problem with my oversea agents, have problems with the whole team. Horrible lah!! I am very tired... Running around the EPZ... Rushing my work... Still have to take care of my study...
There is so many hyprocitics in my office... please please please... If you want to wear a mask infront of me, then don't appear infront of me... don't smile in front of me and behind shoot me with cold arrow.
In term of spiritual life, it is moving no where for me. I don't know what I want to do. Yes I planned with bible studies and ministry participation. But something is missing. I feel that God have not tell me what I need to do for this year. I feel very lost. I feel that spiritually I am not moved.
I feel that I constantly in anger... I am not a happy person anymore... But I can't show it out. I just keep swallowing it down my stomach. I think people tend to take me for granted. It is always like that. When you worked very hard and the things is successful, no one will praise you. Not even a "Thank You." And when something cropped up, all the fingers is pointed at you.
I am going to go on leave... I am going to off my phone... just go missing...
Glad that she is alright...